After a weekend at home with family and old friends I feel better, a little more at ease if you will.
I wanted to wait to confirm my suspicion before I said anything on here just in case I was wrong.
I had a miscarriage.
We were shocked to find out that I was pregnant to begin with since I was still breastfeeding when we conceived but we were ready to make everything work even though the babies would only be 18 months apart and that alone scared me to death!
I know that this is for the better that God knew that this wasnt the time for us to have another baby. I know in my heart as well this wasnt the right time.
So we are just going through the days I am still a little numb about it but calling my mom, sister, and best friend to talk the details made it all a little more real.
I also was reminded as to why I married my husband last week when things were uncertain as to whether we had lost the baby or not (I have yet to show any signs physically of having a miscarriage) he bought me pink cupcakes (my favorite color) and a beautiful card that made me weep. He isnt one to show his emotions but he knows when I need him to and he does. He reminded me that we will make it through this just like we have gotten through everything else.... together.
So I may have a sugary sweet front for awhile on the blog, its my way of coping. Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. It truly means so much to me.