Baby steps

I have a confession to make. One that I havent been able to say out loud so this will be as good as it gets. I havent made a thing for baby boy since all of our "speed bumps" came up. Mostly because I am afraid that anything I make or buy before he comes may become a reminder if something goes terribly wrong. My heart is saying one thing and my head says another. Today though I told myself to get over it and enjoy this pregnancy for all that it is and to just keep my mantra, happy and healthy, going strong in my mind.

Today as I had to stay at my doctors office for three hours for another glucose test I cast on what will become baby boys first blanket. And today I took a giant leap of faith, happy and healthy he will be.


Katie Jean said...

All things happen for a reason Stef. If you're heart is telling you to create, do it. I'm glad you're casting on. Think of you guys ;)

little dresses said...

I am still praying for you and your sweet boy.


Aurelie said...

I couldn't pick out names (buy anything, commit to a baby shower, make items) for mine forever. Until after they were born, really. A paralyzing fear that somehow if they had names, there would be nothing left to stop my extremely early preterm labor.

Faith and optimism can go a long way.

Can't wait to see what you make.

denitza said...

He will be a strong and healthy baby! Keep being positive! I can't wait to see what you make! Hugs to you

Glitter Workshop said...

Good for you to start the blanket! I felt that way for a long time too. It finally took an adorable hedgehog onesie at a craft show when I was about 6 months along with Henri, until I felt it was ok to start planning things for him.

I didn't start his room until the last minute either and completely stressed about it!

Poor guy, I still haven't actually made him hardly anything... I do have an elf hat in the making for him... again, poor guy!!


sulu-design said...

A very touching confession. Wishing you and your family well, and thinking super positive thoughts!

sassypriscilla said...

I'm sorry to hear of your rough pregnancy. Little ones are so resilient and so will you be. When I was pregnant with my son, we found out about a serious heart defect at my 20 week ultrasound. It changed the game from all fun and games to very serious. But as time passed, I was able to fully enjoy my pregnancy even knowing what we were to possibly face when he was born. BTW, he is a happy, healthy, zany kindergartener now. I will pray for your sweet baby's health, your health, and for strength for you and your family.

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